A breadless concept.

Possibly one of the only in depth food related posts I will ever make.
Can you imagine a world with no bread?

Like really imagine, there was no bread or bread products eg Bagels. What would you do?
With no bread, there would be no:
Sammiches, so what would you do with that bacon?
Rolls, so what would you put in the basket on the restaurant table?
Bagels, so what would you do with the cream cheese?
Tasty smells by bakeries, so why bother going to a bakery anyway?
Naan, so what would you do with the rest of the curry sauce?

(I'm feeling sick talking about food in this post but I'll carry on anyway)

and there would be no toast.
No. Toast.
Anywhere. No toast to be found. No cheese on toast, no buttered toast, no toast at all with anything on it.

Which means that most of the jokes for this show:


Wouldn't exist. That means the show wouldn't be funny so no one would watch it, depriving children everywhere of a decent cartoon to watch while eating their toast- BUT THERE IS NO TOAST. No toast means a breakfast is gone, the eggs are lonely, the butter is untouched, and who would buy a toaster if there was no bread to be toasted?
The kitchen appliances market would lose revenue and probably crash without toasters, because no one would have tea and toast anymore. If they didn't have tea with their toast, or toast with their tea, they'd need neither a kettle nor a toaster.

Everyone knows Breakfast is important and everyone recommends eating it (yet I don't. I'm hardcore and don't listen to rules like that.) but what would happen if there was no bread? what would many commuters have for breakfast? Toast is convenient and fast, and tasty and epic. You cannot take a bowl of cereal with you on a morning commute, it will spill all over the train. Then if you dont have breakfast, you can't concentrate at work. Then you get fired. Everywhere people are getting fired for not concentrating driving unemployment up and straining the taxpayer, who is also getting fired at an alarming rate meaning they can't afford to pay tax! if they can't afford to pay tax who will fund the schools and hospitals? Children will leave with no qualifications because there isn't enough money for text books. Speaking of them, if they have no breakfast, they can't concentrate either, so they're wasting their time as zombies with no breakfast, unable to learn a thing. Skilled workers would fall into a standstill, no wages paid and no work being done. The whole world would grind to a halt.

Humanity would die out as people desperately tried to find a solution to this global catastrophe.



So STOP.




And thank your baker.

Sharing my stupidity with the world.

Right so just now, about 15 minutes ago I realised I need to change the light bulb in a lamp I broke. No comment on how. So I go downstairs to get the lightbulb, no worries, go into the bathroom for the only reason you ever go into the bathroom, and find a bottle of bleach. Reading the back for no reason whatsoever I see the words

USE UNDER THE RIM TO PROTECT YOU FROM FLYING TOILET GERMS.

Flying toilet germs gave me the mental image of MRSA and E Coli in biplanes and pilot goggles, having a dogfight over my toilet, so I go to eliminate these airborne terrorist pilots and realise you can't even use the bleach under the rim of the toilet anyway. Stupid bleach manufacturer.

So I find the can of oust surface disinfectanty stuff, and suddenly see a spider above the fridge, so I sprayed it with the oust. It didn't do much, unlike the other day when I got a spider in my sink and poked it down the plug hole, it crawled back out. tried to wash it down, didn't go down. So I poked it down the plug hole and poured bleach down the drain, meaning the spider is now dead, bleach covered, but mostly dead, This other spider now just smells like old ladies and is nice and clean.

Then I see an old clarinet book and have a flick through that, thinking of all this stuff I could play tomorrow instead of actually doing the homework I should be doing like I have today, then see the kettle and think yeah actually a cup of tea would be cool right now, so I flick it on, brother comes in and puts his cup down too and as usual, we get into a mock ninja fight in the kitchen, complete with sound effects. Finish making tea, pick up clarinet book, go back upstairs.

Forgot light bulb.

Go back downstairs, look for light bulbs, return victorious thinking I have won the battle.

IT DIDN'T FUCKING FIT.